Blast from the Past

Today while rummaging around my computerized documents I ran across some musings of the past. Here’s a look inside my mind when I was about 19 or so, when I thought it was cool to not properly capitalize words.

4.8.08—it is with regrettably truthful admittance that i relay this next sentence. last night it was quite a possible scenario that i poisoned the family. it was absolutely out of sync with my every desire, and i must say, i was aware of the potential danger, even took meaningful steps to avoid such pitfalls. however, it was all in vain. it is universally acknowledged that moments of mindlessness lead to lives of regret, and that one must do one’s best to keep one’s wits about themselves at all times in pursuit of what some would call success, and in this case, we shall title “the breath within your lungs”.

last evening, just after hearing jennifer’s voice invite herself to my house, i heard jennifer’s voice demand cupcakes. now, i am the sort of person that doesn’t mind trouble, but feels that it should be avoided at all costs. that being said, i set to work to see what could be done with the baking and distribution of cupcakes. after raiding the upper cabinets (the lower have nothing but empty containers and pickled cucumbers) i found my search to be rather fruitless except for a container of three or five year old cream cheese frosting. i’m not particularly in the habit of eating old foods, so i discarded it onto the counter and returned to a state of thinking.

thinking, i have discovered, does not always run true to the set of things. it may, however, have a lot to do with the fact that i think with my mind and i imagine with my mind and therefore my mind is somewhat contracted within itself and near to the point of imploding at every moment.

upon realizing there was nothing much more i could do, i stole jennifer and her red beatle for a trip to town to 1. acquire cake mix and up-to-date frosting, 2. rent movies, 3. be stared at by mexicans. arriving home with all these experiences either in our minds, or in our walmart bag, we embarked on the adventure of baking cupcakes. which is a happy experience. i beg you to find someone who doesn’t think that cupcakes possess a certain willingness to be happy. i find them to be equivalent to balloons in a clear blue sky blown by the invisible winds, and i think most people would.

cupcakes were baked and cooled and setting upon the counter. now begins the icing. i grabbed the frosting from the counter and began frosting the lovely happy cupcakes, and then distributing them along with happiness to the family. we all enjoyed the tasty wonderfulness, though later jennifer and i experienced a bit of grumbling in the stomach region.

however, upon cleaning up the kitchen, as the empty frosting container was falling into the trash can i caught the expiration date which read either three or five years old. my thoughts? “oh no!”

the general grumbling in my stomach then became more relational to strong thunderstorms. the family may die and i would be the cause. no, the frosting would be the cause and i would be the mediator, the deliverer of such unhappiness. how could cupcakes be this unpleasant? a silent doom slowly sank about the ridges of my heart. i ran upstairs and reluctantly exposed my ill actions to audra and jennifer. such regret can hardly be expected to stay inside. one would explode with such rebellious storms raging within.

we all accepted our fate. one already knows when tasting evil sweetness that one may be one step closer to dying from too much goodness, which is a common happening nowadays, and has acknowledged and accepted the challenges of perishing to the wiles of sugar.

i quite happily inform you that everyone woke up this morning.

5.7.08—i need to go shower. i think the people at church would appreciate it if i didn’t look homeless when i walked in.

although, there is this one guy who’s always very dirty, and they still accept him. i don’t, because he looks at me weird, but that’s a different story.

7.8.08—this morning i was sitting at my brother hadley’s dining room table eating grapes and muffins with ashlyn. she picked up a grape and displayed it to me and said “these..have water in them”